Conversations with Dad and Mark

I've been musing on how easy it is for me to tie myself up in knots and invent problems for God to deal with rather than think about what He is really challenging me about. I mean, if something really is a problem, surely He can make it clear, being the maker of the world and all...

Kath: Do you think it's wrong that I seem to be different with different friends? Do you think that I'm not being true to myself? Do you think there is a problem with that?

Dad: Well, if you are really doing things just to please the other person, things that really go against you, then it might be a problem. But you know that different people can give off sparks in you and bring out different bits of your personality.

Kath: But what if it's a mixture, what if sometimes I'm just being different to please everyone around me? Oh, but I know that sometimes people do bring out different bits of me. But how can I be sure that every time I'm with different friends I'm being consistent with who I really am. How can I know what my real motives are? What if I just don't know why I am behaving the way I do around my friends?

Dad and Mark: (looking at each other and laughing hysterically at Kath's attempt to well and truly tie herself up in knots and get worried about something indefinable that probably isn't a problem) Well if you really don't know, why don't you stop worrying about something that you don't know and can't define and find a real problem to worry about?

My head can certainly twist me in knots at times, I guess the thing to do is pray that God brings clarity, that he forgives the hidden sins I don't know about and that I focus on getting to know him better and repenting of the stuff I am aware of. Phew. It's a good job I've got people to laugh at me.