Tuesday, July 12, 2005

The start?

For about two years now, I have been tempted to blog. Somehow I’ve always been stopped by the thought of what I would post, whether my endless ramblings on life would be of interest to anyone, let alone to me. I’ve been stopped by the fear of it descending into internal rants, self pitying moaning or self indulgence. And really, who would want to read the thoughts of this mind? It’s an interesting thing to ponder. There is also the fear of exposing the inner working of my mind onto a page, where it can be misunderstood, and my thoughts open to criticism or opposition. But if they can’t take healthy debate and understanding, I guess they aren’t really worth articulating.

Being the first post I guess this should be something of a statement about what to expect here in this space. I want more than an online diary, I’m not sure recounting a day in the life of Kath will be worth it. My tales of eating porridge for breakfast aren’t that interesting to anyone. I’m concerned to start conversations in this life. Too often we accept the reality of the world with which we are presented (I’m sure someone else said that at some point…) and fail to recognise the affect the invisible has on all we do and are.

I am a Christian. But it’s an easy thing to say and label myself as. What that means has far reaching consequences on all I do and say. (hopefully) But I’m interested in exploring what that really means. I love God, but recognise the ease of applying my preconceptions to Him without discovering who He really is. I love the Bible. But I want to explore the affect it has in a world empty of truth. I want to call attention to reality both in my life and in the lives of those who live around me. I believe in questioning and searching and seeking until you find. I believe in truth as tangible as the gravity that holds me to this earth, and I believe in one man taking on all I deserved on a cross 2000 years ago. I struggle to comprehend what that really means for all who live around me, and struggle to believe. But I cannot walk away from Him.

I spend my life swinging from opinion to opinion in the hope of pleasing all I meet. It’s a problem of mine. But through the different styles, the different expressions, I’m learning to sense the weaving Spirit, the truth from the lies and the diversity and beauty of our maker.

I also love chilled out things as well, simple stuff, worth mentioning and focusing on. I’m very aware that this blog could disappear into the realm of pompous statements of seemly great importance. The simple stuff of life helps me avoid that. I love music, friends, long walks on the beach, sunsets, the lake district, cups of tea, long chats into the night, swimming, chocolate cake and hugs.

So there you go, if you like random thoughts of a slightly cynical or over idealistic nature, random musings on reality and cups of tea, stick around. Comment, continue the conversations and sense the invisible that moves and transforms the visible world in front of us.


Blogger thebluefish said...

Here's to cynical idealism.

12/7/05 10:42 pm  

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